P!nk - Walk of Shame (Official Lyric Video)

Walk of Shame

Jan 29, 2008

I'm pushing Samantha in the jogging stroller and savoring the fresh air on a surprisingly warm winter afternoon, when a mom in a minivan rolls down her window and greets us. She's driving her daughter home from school.

"Oh, you picked up early today?" I ask.

She looks at me confused. "No, today was an early release day."

Every so often, the school lets the kids out about an hour and 20 minutes early, and in my typical unorganized fashion, I forgot to record the dates in my new 2008 calendar. (Yes, I know I'm probably one of about 14 Americans who still keeps a schedule with pen and paper.)

"Oh S#*$!"

I bolt down the street with the jogging stroller, Samantha screaming, "Weeeeee this is fun," and then screaming—"NOOOOO, I don't want to go home," as I skid the stroller around the corner on one wheel.

"We have to go home and get the car keys, Mommy forgot Joshy at school."Did I just say that out loud? Ugh.

When I open the door to the school office I head straight to Josh and give him a huge hug. I drop to my knees, look him in the eyes and say, "Honey, I'm so sorry."

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"It's okay—I got to see a lot of action in the office after school," he says.


I'm thankful that my first-born isn't ready to disown me or trade me in for Nick's mom (Josh's recent favorite because Nick gets to watchPower Rangers), but I'm still shaking from the horror of being Way-Late Mom. I slink over to the school secretary in shame and explain that I'm the mom who forgot to collect her child at dismissal.

Days later, I'm sifting through our junk mail and I find a piece of paper listing school events for the month: "Important—Tuesday is early release day." Clearly, I need a separate sheet of neon paper that screams: "JULIE—DON'T FORGET YOUR KID AT SCHOOL!"

Though Josh is far from traumatized and he's rather good at waiting patiently, I can't help but feel like LOSER MOM. He may not even remember this mommy mishap.

Video: Walk of Shame TRAILER 1 (2014) - Elizabeth Bank, Gillian Jacobs Movie HD

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